i've started my summer classes last week. what a drag, like seriously. classes are set at 9 and i can't do anything about it. dang. end up i'm always late. at least the tutor's great and i wont fall asleep in tutorials. luckily. the subject is really hard, more of like a theory part of accounting. eew. eeeeewwwww. 

christmas is coming. and it means what. its gona be his birthday. sighs. i really really have no idea of what to buy for him. something that could show my sincerity yet inexpensive as i'm always as broke as ever. a huge sigh man i'm really bummed by it. i've bin planning and thinking what to buy but it seems that nothing really interests him greatly and he already has most of it. its more of like deciding in buying this thing and the next thing i know i changed my mind. so at the end i still end up present-less and it is like 4 days away. omfg. i think i would just end up packing an ang pao for him. haha. its a good thing he don't read blogs.

and as usual, i'm as lonely as ever. i just don't know why i'm being so lifeless. i don't choose to be like that but what can i do. all i do is stay at home brooding at my pitifulness. aww gawd....i really do sound pitiful. its like...waking up with nothing to look forward to, and then heading downstairs to takeaway the eew eew food that i'm so sick of and then ending up eating in front of my laptop or a novel. there, getting more n more pitiful when i just lay on the bed and stare up at the ceiling. people would ask, don't u have friends? where's ur boyfriend. sad to say, they all have lives. just that i don't. why huh?

i have absolutely no idea.

i'm pathetic.

man this sounds awful.

okay, enough of self-pitifulness. at least i have something to look forward to next week cause it will be christmas. not that i'll be santa this year. or even whether to think that i've been good at all this year. santa would have run away if he bumped into me. haha. but i'm going to singapore and it means serious shopping. cool.

there's like a mega sale going on, but i still haven't gotten on into a shopping spree. as usual i'm broke so its out of the question. i really should monitor my outflow of cash. yeap, that will be my new year resolution. i just wish i have a car. santa please grant me this wish.

lesson of the day : don't trust anyone. don't simply fall for anyone. cause they are mostly liars. but this could be very subjective. it depends tho.

i do admit my blog entries are truckloads of shitty nonsense and boringness of me. so don't read it if u think its boring.



the love of my life


cutest miniature poodle eva!!

when will we ever learn? people makes mistakes, yet they don't learn from them. why? is it cause they just don't have the sense to know what's right and what's wrong? i've seen people makes mistakes, receive the consequences and yet they make the same mistake again, and yet, they want to complain and blame others for what that has happened. personally..i think they should just eat rubbish instead.

there's many chapters in life. or maybe, there's more to life than just love. like your friends, family, money, education, the environment!! ya.. can't believe im going green. anyway, i really dislike people who just ditch their friends just for their partner (so called love of their life) cause you know what? you're just gonna breakup someday. or get dumped. i mean, come on...its not like ure gonna marry your current boyfriend/girlfriend. we're still so young!! instead, your friends are the people who are going to attend your wedding, shower you with their blessings and be at your first child's first birthday! so, do treasure your friends out there. cause you're nothing without your friends, you feel proud now and would probably think "i have my boyfriend/girlfriend to accompany me, i don't need friends". think again. think when u got dumped. i would like to see how those people are going to pick up their pieces of life and how they move on. it's not easy okay.

like i said, there's many chapters in life. if there's a starting, there will be sure an ending regardless good or bad, we should just remember the happy ones. keep it as a good memory. sad memories bury it deep in your heart ya. one thing i've tried before is to write unhappy things in a piece of paper, then i burn it. there! i've let it out and felt much better after that.

the feeling of guilt, vengeful and regretness really sucks all the happiness in life. either one can turn my whole world black and white. so why keeping all these negative feelings in your heart? the most important thing is to let it out. let out all the sad and negative feelings and u'll feel much better.

but its all easier said than done. i don't mean to be a hypocrite in saying all these things as me, myself has done shit in life which i cannot turn back. but what i do know is that i learn from it and never repeat it again. sometimes, unless we got caught red handed, we'll never change.

but don't worry, nothing has happened to me. its just that an incident that happened to a very close friend of mine makes me remember all these things which also makes me learn again.

everyone has their own sad chapters in life. no one has a perfect, spotless, innocent past. its all about learning in life, learn from your mistakes, learn from your past.

gawd. i sound so emo today. probably cause too much of studying. another paper on monday and another on wednesday

and....
....
..
.

my birthday!!!!
on the friday which is the 7th of November (ahem)

i cant wait seriously.

wow. i'm still up at 4am in the morning! TIME TO SLEEP.


whenever i lose myself, i think of you


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